I Get to Speak My Truth

 Good Morning,

Oh. You guys. I have felt every emotion there is to feel in the past 24 hours. I've felt sad, I've felt overwhelmed, I've felt scared, grateful, angry and anxious.

If you don't know already, if you don't watch my Willow's Whimsy YouTube Channel, please do. I am getting closer to realizing the first of many goals with this channel, being my hitting 1000 subscribers. I need this more than ever right now, if nothing else, to give me hope that something I do has meaning.

Anyways, I mentioned yesterday and today that my car got repossessed by the loan company. I'm letting it go, they want 6K to get it back and the car isn't worth that.

So I have to let it go.

So I have no car. 

And this brings up the question of do I keep this job or not?

I think first I'll tell you what's been going on and maybe try and pick that apart.

My boss is horrible. She's not a nice person. She is the type who will raise her voice and say horrible things to you and accuse you in a way that says, "I'm right so don't even argue." And she overrides anything you say as if it doesn't have meaning, it doesn't matter, the only things that matters in her world, is her opinion. It's the only one that is true.

She's just awful. I went back and forth for a long time, kind of liking her. She's an anomaly because she'll be really nice but then she'll just turn on you and rip you a new asshole and not even let you defend yourself.

Case in point; she is OCD about stapling and how the paperwork is stapled. And one time, I used a paper clip because I wasn't sure and she fucking lost it and she shamed me. And she yells so the guys in the other office can hear her. She's a very loud woman. It was like the scene in Mommy Dearest, "YOU USED THE WIRE HANGERS."

You guys, this was over a paperclip.

I've had several health issues and prior to the car getting taken, it had broken down and I busted my ass to make it to work in spite of all that. I have the receipts. I have screenshots of all the Ubers I took and how much it cost me to get there. I have screenshots of emails and texts making arrangements to have people pick me up. And she calls me unreliable. Unreliable. For things that I have no control over, like the car and yes, the health things are probably the result of choices I have made and have chosen to ignore the consequences and I did have to miss work but I brought in notes, and I brought in the hospital records showing the dates I was there and still that word; unreliable.

Would someone unreliable pay $80.00 a day that they don't have to get to work? Would someone unreliable do everything in their power, including putting up dramatic posts on FB to try and get rides from people so I don't have to pay this kind of money. Would someone exhausted after being taken by Ambulance to the emergency room for a medical crisis at 2AM and getting released at around 8AM, beg on FB for someone to come pick her up and take her home so that she could get out of her pajamas and go into work? How the fuck does that make me unreliable? Unreliable.

No empathy whatsoever for anyone else. She's a big but girl and you all know how I feel about the big buts. "I mean, I know this is hard for you and I feel for what you're going through but I need you to be reliable."

Yet this woman takes entire days off when her kids are home from school, she has called in twice herself since I've been there because one of her kids was sick but you don't hear me going, "Oh, I mean, I understand it's hard when they get sick but I need you to be reliable."

She does not lead by example, she leads by "Do as I say and not as I Do."

I get lectures every time I do something wrong, instead of a helpful correction. Yes, I do things wrong. Oh my God, I can admit that. Oh my God, I'm human. You would NEVER get an admission from her. I guess you can't from a person who "never makes mistakes of her own" and I've seen them, for sure they are not as numerous as mine but I bite my tongue, which is not like me, I do say I'm sorry because I actually am, this woman hasn't been sorry for a single thing in her life, because again, she does no wrong. 

The other day, I had to admit something embarrassing and at the end of the day, because I'm accountable, what I did was wrong but when I deal with people who have done something wrong, let the punishment fit the crime and I'll explain.

About two months after I started, she wasn't in, she almost always waltzes in around 10, though she has occasionally been there as early as 9:30. Her big thing is that she's always working, even when she's at home and yeah, you know, she does. She just doesn't do it to the extent that she wants people to think because you know, "I work so hard, I work harder than anyone else, even if I'm not there and I have 3 kids 5 and under who distract me and who have all sorts of evening sports, etc." 

But I digress. This employee came in and was looking for something in the supply cabinet. The supply cabinet is opposite my boss's desk but on the same side of the office as her if that makes sense.

There are file cabinets next to the supply cabinet. I was never told to stay out of those or that the supplies didn't spill over into these cabinets. So I looked in them to see if any of them had supplies because this person couldn't find what he was looking for. I was trying to be proactive so she wouldn't shame me later for not knowing. She's a big shamer, this one. It's brutal. Again, I don't usually take this kind of stuff seriously and I have known for quite awhile that I need to find a different job, I became complacent for a whole lot of reasons that didn't serve me; things like low self-esteem, laziness, feelings of anxiety about the application/interview process and because her abuse happens on the daily, I have become quiet. I don't even try to explain myself because she won't listen, she shuts you down, she overrides you. And she degrades and shames you. And somewhere in this, I let myself become a victim to her and of her. 

But again, I digress. When I opened the other file cabinet drawers, I quickly realized that there were no supplies in there. What I did see was a bag of candy, chocolates. So...even though a little voice in me was telling me not to, I took a few of them and over the past few months, I've taken more of them and then there were none left and I decided I better get her a new bag.

So I did and I put it where the other candy was.

And she flipped the fuck out.

There was a coworker there while this went down and she told me the bigger issue is not that I took her candy (yes it is actually), but that I went through her personal space. She told me I was disgusting and NOT OK. She completely shamed, degraded, humiliated and embarrassed me. In front of this other coworker.

I'm gonna unpack this. At the end of the day, I was wrong but let me just say this. I never rifled around that file cabinet to see what else was there. I never dug through her things. My only focus was that candy. Still wrong but hold me accountable for what I did do instead of jumping to horrible, incorrect assumptions and voicing them in a voice timbre that could shatter glass. You don't get to accuse me of something and not let me defend myself. But noone gets to defend themselves ever with her. Noone. I have seen this played out over and over and over again with other employees. 

She lives to shame people. She has no time to consider other opinions, she is just always right and she will shame you even more if you try to defend yourself and completely override you.

There is only her opinion, there is only her beliefs.

If I was looking through her things, I mean my answer to that is why would I do that? She has nothing I want. If I were going to "rifle through" anything, it'd be the petty cash drawer. Duh.

I'm so paranoid about her nastiness, that when a customer pays with cash, I attach a sticky note to it with the customers name and the invoice number so she knows I actually gave it to her. I even take pictures of it with my phone because she's certifiably, undeniably, psychotic.

I have had numerous people now tell me to sue her for a hostile work environment. All I want is to get out of there.

You know, she loves to talk about my life and give her opinions on all these awful things that I've gone through lately. She is without consideration for reality. Again, because she chooses not to listen. 

And none of what she thinks I should do or change or what have you, is aligned with what the good people in my life tell me. The people who love me. 

I gotta tell ya, I spoke to a good friend last night and she wasn't mean, but she shared some things with me that a friend should be able to say. She said these things with love and care and consideration for my feelings. And the things she said, though difficult to hear, were the complete opposite of what my boss says to me. Because my boss doesn't really know me, she doesn't know what makes me, me. She doesn't know my life and my history and my struggles and my fucking ACCOMPLISHMENTS AND the battles I've fought and won.

She fired the woman who was in my position before me. She told me all sorts of things about her and one of the things she said is that this woman changed overnight, that she one day she just stopped speaking to her (my boss) and that she started making all kinds of mistakes, etc.

I already know what happened because I'm living it now. And my heart goes out to this woman. I googled her and I found her address but you have to pay for her phone number and I'm not going to do that but I have her address and as soon as someone can take me to that address, I'm going to ring the doorbell and have a talk with her. And I'm going to tell her how sorry I am, because I judged her without knowing anything about her, I judged her based on what my boss said but now I'm in a position of not wanting to speak to her regarding anything other than work and how do I tell her that. I'm so beat up and feel so abused at this point, that I'm afraid the old me will come out, the one who clocked a bitch and put her in her place. She gets so nasty and so loud and is so mean but she has no clue what still lives inside of me and the fact that those demons are being stirred up and awoken, that's on her. 

I'm using all my tools but someone can only take so much and I'll speak on that in a moment. I just have one more thing to talk about.

She's evil.

I feel like I've been working with Satan.

I have to be very, very careful here. You'll notice I'm not using names. 

Some of you are my friends and you know those details but the mass readership, you understand why those things, names and identifying information, must be kept confidential.

She has...someone in her life...who she speaks about often. If an outsider were to hear her speaking, they would assume that my boss hates the person she tells me about and bitches about on a daily basis.

I'll give her, my boss, this; she paints a pretty convincing picture at first, until you start to experience her abuse personally...she paints a gooooood picture. And for some reason, she choose to share with me a detailed IQ report on this person and I still can't quite figure out what her motives in doing so were. Because rather than convince me of anything against the person she clearly resents and hates so much, my heart broke for that person and I was ashamed of myself for believing my boss. I cried when I got home that day. Like, part of me wonders if I should report this to someone. This person doesn't function per what society would deem the norm but that report spoke volumes to me and my heart softened and so I don't want to be subjected to my boss's tirades against this person anymore. I don't know how to tell her to stop though because she's so vicious. 

Clearly, I need to find another job and with the car gone, I will be spending $500 a week on Ubers to get there, leaving me with $230.00 per week to pay rent, buy food, pay my other bills, etc.

This is not sustainable but some money is better than no money and I must use this to rouse myself out of my lethargy. I am not good at this job, I've been able, in my life, to obtain administrative work doing the things I excel at...for the most part; writing, creating training, newsletters, calendar management, travel, creating reports, human resources, that kind of thing I've excelled at...this is the second job I've had that A - has lots of little details and no organized training manuals to follow and B - where you have to remember to face this packet like this, this one like that, staple this one this way, staple this one that way, put this with that but not with that, that or that...she has OCD too and it shows in her the way she organizes. 

Everyday, I am supposed to raise the blinds right next to my desk but there is a horrible sun glare in the  morning and I can't see my computer but if she comes in early enough, she'll go right over and lift the blinds up, even though I've fucking asked her not to, not until the sun is completely past the window.

Evil.

Fucked Up.

Pyscho.

Mean.

Still. If I am a victim, it is because I've allowed myself to be one. No more. I'm Denise Motherfucking Johnson. This bitches days of having power and control over my feelings and worse yet, how I feel about myself...those are over. Done. She can fire me. Unlike my predecessor, I have receipts and I have am documenting everything. From here on out, it all goes on paper.

Might not ever need those notes. If I do, they might not mean anything to unemployment or to court but I'll know.

So, there you have it.

I think you're all up to speed.

I was offered help with the bankruptcy today.

And it made me think...just take the fuckin' Ubers to work, use the energy of gratitude for all the amazing help I've gotten and just...use that energy to find a new job as quickly as possible. If it's on a busline, I'll work farther away but otherwise, it has to be here in my current county so that these Ubers don't kill me. 

I'll worry about a car soon enough.

Now is not that time.

Not with what's about to happen to me financially.

Yes, I'm super scared and not gonna lie, I wish for a miracle and maybe I should tell the Universe hey, I expect a miracle and you know, just do all the right things until it finally shows up but you know, they happen constantly for me. People help me. I am loved and cared for every fucking day.

I have been given money, I have been given food...so many people who know what this woman is paying me....they know it's not sustainable and so...we get food, we get gas cards, we get money. I am blessed and blessed and blessed. And I don't understand why people love me, I don't. I don't understand why people want to help me but I'm humbled by it and so grateful. 

And it's this that keeps me going. I'm not talking about all the gifts, I'm talking about the love and respect of my peers, of my family and my friends.

I am blessed beyond measure with love. My cup is full and soon, hopefully, Gods willing, so too, will be my wallet.

Biggest love to all of you.

Thank you for the kind responses I get here and the support.

From here on out, while I will share what's hard, I'm going to also really try to focus on solution.

But today, I needed to get the poison out because it's threatening to take me down.

Can't keep it inside.

Thank you so S, E, L, G & H for listening to me cry last night and again today and for loving me so much.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie

Don't Even Know...WTF

Hello…

My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

I got nothing and at the same time, I got everything.

My car got repoed.

I called the attorney and he said that to get it back, I will have to pay the value of the car, which is around 6K.

So the car is gone for good and I need to pay the attorney immediately so garnishments don’t begin.

I am not going to lie. I want to quit this job. I want to walk the fuck out now. I hate this job. I can’t stand my boss. She’s consumed with herself and has no boundaries in how she treats other people.

And you know, oh my God, I am not one to take shit but not only have I taken it from this horrorshow of a woman, I have eaten it.

I’m eating shit.

Everyday.

Fuck this.

I want my mom. I do, I want my mom.

But she went to heaven.

So did my dad.

And here I am. And I am completely overwhelmed and have no idea what the right thing to do is.

My boss humiliated and degraded me yesterday. I have to get out of here.

At some point, doesn’t this have to balance out? Can the Universe be done picking on me for awhile? Go pick on someone who deserves it.

I called the cops to find out if I had to report the car just in case it was stolen and they actually were able to confirm that it was the loan company.

So fuck them.

I get it.

I’m not mad at the loan company, I’m mad at myself.

I just…I make shit for money. How the fuck am I supposed to pay the attorney when I have NO MONEY?

I have been circling the drain for so long and just fucking holding on in each situation and I can see the end goal, it’s right there but I can’t fucking get there because the current pulling me under is to fucking strong.

I want to quit. I want to just grab my purse and walk out of here right now. I don’t even care if it’s the fucking hood. I want to start walking and just walk somewhere…anywhere.

I don’t want to be here.

My heart is pounding, I want to throat punch someone (my boss preferably) and just fly. Just fly.

I don’t want to work for someone who is no empathy in her whatsoever. She bitches about her stepdaughter who is autistic all the time and it’s fucking cruel.

But I pretend to be supportive.

You can’t say anything to my boss. She overrides you. She’s awful.

Please God, get me OUT of here.

I DON’T want to be here anymore.

I don’t know what else to say. I got nothing but ick that wants to come out.

If I get through this day without walking out of here permanently, it will be nothing short of a  miracle. My boss is going to be in late this morning and she better keep her fat fucking yap shut.

At this point, I’m fine with going to jail. It would be worth it to clock the bitch.

Ok…ok.

I’m out.

Be Blessed.

Seriously, be blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie

Why Am I Obsessed Over This

 

Hi Everyone,

Good Morning.

So far, my morning has been quiet. Something felt different when I got up this morning. Better. Calmer.

Not that it’s been wild or anything like that but a sense of calm and a sense of being fulfilled in the moment.

I’m not used to sitting in, and being present in, any given moment. But I let myself feel it, I didn’t try to stir things up within my mind. I just took it in.

And I liked it.

It’s been a still day. I suppose that could change but I’m not going to look for it to.

One thing that has weighed heavy on my mind, but that I haven’t come to any conclusion about is Christa Pike. It’s a touchy subject.

I don’t want to replay her crime here, it was horrible. There’s no contesting that part of things. She also was charged with attempted murder and I believe found guilty, in prison. But if you actually do the research, it seems likely that she was defending another prisoner. It wasn’t a random attack.

I mean, I wasn’t there, I don’t know.

Anyways, she was supposed to be put to death last week and she is literally the first person to survive two attempts in a row, to kill her using pentobarbital. They tried twice because that’s what the protocol calls for. She had appealed and applied for clemency but she had also asked that they consider hanging her or shooting her because she legit has issues with her veins.

What she experienced was legit a kind of torture.

And then, they rushed her to the hospital where she was expected not to make it but shockingly, she did.

One of the things that people for the death penalty have been screaming about, is that all this attention is going to Christa and not the victim, Colleen Slemmer.

I have been leaning towards no death penalty. And it’s not that I don’t care what that girl had to endure before she died, I do, it’s too much to contemplate or fully take in because it’s so awful, but there are a lot of things that led up to t he rage Christa experienced.

Things that were not Colleen Slemmer’s fault and that she had nothing to do with. Her mother drank alcoholically during her pregnancy with her, she was sexually abused as a toddler, she was beaten a LOT, then she was sexually assaulted again and one year prior to the murder, she was pulled off the street and raped by a stranger.

I know the arguments here. Many people go through horrific childhoods and they don’t grow up to do these things. I acknowledge that and I get it.

Still. I just feel…two wrongs don’t make a right, let her spend her life in prison. No parole, no way out.

Why can’t that be enough?

And did the torture Christa went through with the botched execution even come close to what Colleen experienced? I have serious doubts.

Still.

But here’s what gets me everytime I try to turn this over in my mind; if it was one of my girls, my sisters, my mom, my besties? I’d want to kill her myself. Like…let me at her.

I know rage. I know abandonment.

Christa is me minus the sexual abuse stuff.

But the rage and how the rage can come upon you in just the right (one could argue wrong) set of circumstances and it boils over, it consumes you.

I just…I don’t know.

Two days ago, they said she was brain dead and was going to be removed from the ventilator the next day, and then yesterday, she woke up.

Is that a God thing? The crazy Christians don’t think so. They’re picky about their miracles. I say Crazy, meaning the ones who claim Jesus but live nothing like how he lived or what he preached.

I do think she’s a miracle. And I’m not a born again anything, I’m not a “God” type of girl. But I do think she’s a miracle, and a warning.

But then…again…what it was someone I loved? That’s changes the playing field drastically.

It’s hard, this is hard stuff.

Why am I wasting my time on this? I have no idea why this story has affected me so much. I guess because I can relate to Christa on some level.

There’s something about her.

The girls who killed Shanda Sharer? I don’t feel the same way. All of them have been released after serving time according to who did what, but at least one of them should’ve received the death penalty as far I’m concerned. And her life was horrid too.

This is why I could never make a good argument either way.

Time to let it go.

Time to just let it go.

But I am doing ritual on the 31^st and I may speak on this…in my circle, alone with my idea of that which is greater than I.

I just had to write it all out, because I’ve been a bit obsessive about it and it’s time to let go, like I just wrote.

So we are in for 3 bizarrely warm days. I’m not a happy camper about that but it is what it is and supposedly, it’ll plummet right back down to my happy temps after the 3 days.

Sheesh.

I don’t know how, but I resisted picking today. I have a gaping wound on my arm that started out as two separate wounds and now are almost one.

This is terrible. I wish I could stop. But I resisted long enough to get to work and to put some anti bacterial stuff on it and get it covered with a bandaid. I have an ouch on my lower arm and my leg too. I picked at the one on my leg but didn’t do too much damage. I hate that I have this thing.

At the end of all that, yeah, it’s so far been a good, calm day.

I love envisioning the day I can walk out of here for the last time.

It’s not an anger thing anymore, I ask humbly, to whoever is in charge of this thing called life, they he/she/it/they remove from this current experience and provide me with one more in line with my financial needs and what I’m good at doing.

Thank you.

Ok, have a good day everyone.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie

Nostalgia

 

Good Morning,

Deep breaths. I just got word that one of my bestie’s lost her mom last night. There’s a whole history there.

It’s funny how when you get older, those histories don’t always matter the way they once did, or they hold no power and how you can see as an adult, the bigger picture.

I got to see her mom about a month and a half ago.

And for me at least, everything came full circle.

So why the tears?

I often write about my nostalgia for my youth and I don’t think I’m unique in that. I just long to go back.

Kirsten, Lisa and I, tearing up terror and shenanigans and much laughter. Years of Kirsten and I creating shenanigans and memories…you know, it’s just hard.

Of the core group of us, only I have one parent still living; Lisa’s mom and dad are gone, Shari’s mom and dad are gone, Becky’s mom and dad are gone and now Kirsten too, has lost both parents.

I have lost my birthfather, and my Grandparents who raised me (for me, they were mom and dad) but my bio mom is still alive and I do consider her to be my “mommy” as I call her.

It’s a very strange thing, moving into the role of elder. I can’t say I enjoy it. I much prefer the freedom of my youth, thank you very much.

Mommy will be 78 this year and I hope she stays as long as possible, as long as she is in good health and no pain.

The no pain thing, the no suffering thing, is huge for me. I don’t hold well with pain and suffering and I have told everyone if it gets to that for me, or if I’m diagnosed with dementia in the early stages, I’m out.

I don’t want anyone to be surprised by that.

If I don’t go naturally, and something befalls me, be it illness or just physical pain as I age, I have put everyone on notice that I will take myself out. I have very strong feelings about that.

I want to be remembered as I was and not what I became as a result of illness or infirmity, ya know?

But in a way, our parents are our anchors and my friend’s mom, she was an anchor for me too. She was one of many adults who had an impact on me at one time or another. You know, you have the anchor and the foundation (which were my friendships) was held in place, maybe sometimes not well, but still, the anchors that held my foundation and that of my friends in place).

I wish I could go home.

I just want to cry.

I’m glad it’s not busy here.

I’m proud of my friend for many, many reasons; she took care of her mom. She didn’t have to do that. But she did. And I know my friend is probably feeling all the feelings; sad, relieved, exhausted. I’m sure there are so many memories coming up.

Not sure what I can do for her, but I want to do something.

It’s hard. My sister lost her lil’ Chatty Girl puppy recently and sometimes you don’t know what to do or say. But I try and I’ll show up if they need me to.

Mmmm…sad. So sad.

Not what I expected for this past week.

Life happens, right, and sometimes…life…changes.

I hope you all have a wonderful day.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie

To Live Like A Cat

Good Morning,

I guess if I could learn to live in the moment, I wouldn’t sit here all week waiting on Friday.

I’m not there yet.

Having something for the pain in my back is great but it also knocks me out.

So I woke up at 3 and really struggled to get back to sleep.

So I checked in on some of my applications and I got turned down for 3 of them.

Then I looked at my YouTube channel and I lost 2 subscribers.

I suppose I could fall to the ground and writhe in self pity.

But I also saw a post that reminded me that only I have the power to change my life, that it’s within me.

I hate that I have to go just sit there all day.

Because that’s largely what I do.

But I also know not to throw in the towel because of a few rejections.

And they’re not rejecting me, they are rejecting my experience and my resume and really…they are probably rejecting the gaps in employment.

Duh!

I have a way around that but not everyone wants to deal with it.

Or hear about it.

I gotta keep trying.

So tonight, I’m gonna hold off on taking anything for the back pain until I at least put in one job app.

So.

Here we go.

Pumpkin is sitting next to me, happily cleaning herself.

I wish I could do that all day; clean myself, nap, pester my mother for food and treats and make her brush my hair and oooo and awwww over me with compliments and hugs and cuddles. “You’re the best. You’re so cuddly, you’re beautiful, just such a beautiful baby. And then you know, I’d get a rush of the zoomies and run around and torture everyone and then do it all over again.

Yes, I would love that.

Alright, on with it girly.

I hope you have a great day!

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie

  

No Pain

 Good Morning!

Monday has arrived yet again.

I wish I could tell you I had a productive Sunday but if you read yesterday's blog, you'll know my back continues to wreak havoc on me.

The muscle relaxer is helping. I'm going to take another one when I get to work but will not be able to take another painkiller until I get back home...if I need it.

I can't be driving while on that stuff. It knocks me out.

Indeed, I slept pretty much from 5PM on last night.

No pain this morning but I need to stay ahead of it.

Much of the problem with this particular pain, is that because of where it's located, I clench up constantly and I think that's why it won't get better this time.

Anyways, getting that help with medication made a huge difference. I slept, it doesn't hurt right now.

I just want you to know...I applied for a job this morning.

I get notices through Indeed and the State of Minnesota, so when one comes up that I'm qualified for, I can be on it quickly.

Good way to start my day anyways.

I paid the rent this morning too. They give us until the 5th.

This is the first time I've paid it and had money left over until my next paycheck.

And that feels great too.

So it would seem I have much to be grateful for today.

And I am.

So on that note, I'm gonna go get dressed, etc. and ready for work and I will be back tomorrow.

Way to go girl (as I pat myself on the back).

I hope you all have a great day.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie

Physical Stuff

Happy Afternoon,

I am so grateful and relieved right now. I’ve tried hard not to post on FB and especially not multiple times but y’all, my back is my arch nemesis.

The best way to describe this is:

It’s right next to my spine on the right hand side and it’s on the lower side of my upper back.

It comes in waves and the only thing I have reference for; is being in labor about to give birth.

The waves feel more like contractions. You have the pain of that but in the middle of these contractions, the pain will travel to other areas both north and south of the original trouble spot.

This started last Monday and has gotten progressively worse. These episodes usually last 2-3 days and doesn’t affect me when I sleep. Well we are going in a week and last night, the pain kept me up.

I try not to bitch about my physical stuff to much but I understand why some do. Pain is awful.

With no insurance, you can guess where I’m going. No one in their right mind, I should say no doctor, in their right mind would prescribe pain medication to someone they hadn’t seen.

I won’t say who on here but someone reached out today saying I would love to see your face. I miss it. I explained what was going on in this person said you need to come see me. So I dropped my daughter off at work and went over to my friends house. I was given some muscle relaxers and some painkillers. Both of these were prescribed so I felt safe accepting it.

I’m on my couch now PAIN FREE.

Have a good night!

Be Blessed!!

Love & Light,

Neecie