Yes, good, it's still morning for 7 more minutes here in Minnesota.
First, today is beautiful. It's going to be the last day of it's kind for as far out as the forecast goes.
Second, I woke up this morning and everything felt horrid.
I didn't get enough sleep, my IBS was such that while I've actually only gone twice, it was horrific. No bueno at all.
The world and my life seemed like shite.
Beyond, ya know, the IBS.
Just everything felt like shite.
But.
I did make a list for myself for today. And this whole STOP thing? Today, I said STOP to myself when I felt like I wanted to give up yet another day; not do shit.
Boy, I'm talking about shit a lot here on this post. But it is what it is.
And I am going through everything on my list for the most part, how I wrote it down to do it.
I do have to add in a trip to the grocery store and a pick up from Cub and to get gas.
I'm checking things off as I go in the hopes that it will inspire me to keep fucking going. Energizer bunny style.
I got on the scale this morning and I'm both mad and glad I did. I'm over 180 and that STOPS now. I will not weigh myself again until Saturday. I needed to see that. No more excuses. If I stick to my meal plan, I want to see how that affects the scale and then make the necessary adjustments.
I am also getting all my fluids in for the day and that actually makes you gain weight at first, especially if you're chronically dehydrated. It goes right through you at first but slowly, your body starts absorbing it and you will gain weight from that. So you have to give it time to become the norm.
So if I can stick to my plan and keep hydrating, I should have a number I can trust on the scale Saturday AM.
As you know, I have ceased and desisted on writing out my daily lists. I'm going to go until bedtime and I'm going to pray I get some good sleep tonight.
I had the window open last night but of course, I don't open it all the way because Pumpkin loves open windows but she's so big, I'm afraid she'll knock the screen out and fall so I only open it about maybe 5 inches or so. But then she sits up there, on the ledge and cries. I cannot afford to run the air yet. I know that sounds crazy...air conditioning? in Minnesota? In March?
Yeah, for real though. Once it gets into the 40s outside, this place heats up like you would not believe and then...it's on. I slept naked, under a sheet and a lightweight blanket last night with the window open and the fan on and I still overheated.
And my daughter was out last night and when she got home, I woke up. Not her fault, she wasn't loud but man...I'm just such a light sleeper. If I don't shut my door completely, it opens all the way and I won't shut it completely because the cats like to get in and out and honestly, if I shut the door completely, they will meow and meow until I give them what they want anyways.
Today, as far as STOP, I am stopping coffee again and I am stopping laziness and the voices that tell me it's OK to just sit on the couch and veg and I am stopping the voices that tell me terrible things about myself.
Below is today's short and yesterday's long form video. Please like (give them a thumbs up), subscribe to my channel and all the good stuff.
I appreciate you!!
Alright, well I hope you all have an amazing day.
Be Blessed.
Love & Light,
Neecie
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