Some Leeway

 

Good Morning!

How is everyone doing? How was your Saturday?

You guys, I cleaned the apartment! It's all done, except for some paperwork I need to sort through and put away.

Thank God.

As crazy as this sounds, I'm going to put cleaning on my list of to do's, starting tomorrow. The thing is, if I don't stay on top of it, I waste my weekend's trying to get back on top of it. I want my Saturdays for what I'm calling my "projects". There are about 5 or six of them.

I want to feel on top of life as much as possible, as opposed to always trying to catch up to it.

So yes, the cleaning happened. 

I also stuck to my plan of 10 smokes. It was hard. It was really hard.

I know that cold turkey is best but I'm just not ready to let go. Tomorrow, the real test comes in, because I'm going down to 5. I'll stay there for 4 days.

I want to get into the mentality that I'm a nonsmoker and finding ways to fill the time and deal with the anxiety that comes as a result of not having one when I usually would. And that's been the first big hurdle.

I won't be bringing any to work with me so that'll be the second big hurdle. You know, no smoke on the drive in, no smoke on the drive home and no smoke breaks.

That's a huge hurdle. And that's why I'm giving myself 4 days at 5.

There are so many places and times that smoking is a part of things. I just have to give the mind fuck stuff a little bit of leeway.

I slept like a champ last night.

I had taken bougie bath and then finished the apartment, after dropping my daughter at work. 

It was a good day. 

Usually, when I have a go day like that, I find myself crashing the next day and it doesn't feel like a crash today.

It feels OK this morning.

We shall see where the day brings me.

I hope you have a great one.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie