Good Morning!
Ah. The job. It went very well. It’s a lot in terms of what I’ll be doing. But I know by what I went through last that I can do this.
I deserve to do this. I deserve to have this. This is a major opportunity for me.
Just believe.
Interestingly, my Grey has been running around like a maniac all morning. I think she’s not as bad as I fear. I fear the worst. The reason I’m so militant about not wanting her to suffer is that I’ll never forget going over to a new friend’s house and we were in her backyard and all of a sudden, this dog walks by us. Walks is too kind of a word. The dog shambles slowly past us. He w listed to one side as he walked. He was emaciated and his tail hung low. I couldn’t believe he was even able to stay standing. I was told he was blind too. I was horrified. There was nothing about this dog that said, “I’m ok.”
My friend told me that it was her son’s dog and he didn’t even live with her anymore but he had forbidden her to put the dog to sleep.
He couldn’t handle it.
And I remember thinking, “ You not being able to handle it is nothing compared to what you’re putting on this dog to handle.”
My sister has had cats and dogs over the years and I’ve watched her care and love for them and then seen her come to the moment when she’s had to make that decision. It’s fucking awful, it’s the worst thing in the world, but she’s made that decision out of love. Love for her animals.
I just have never been able to forget that one dog I wrote about, my friend’s son’s dog. He was a ghost dog. He was half in the other world already. And that’s the image that haunts me when I think about what’s happening with Grey.
But she is not there. I watch and I love her and I’ll know.
So.
The job.
Yes, it is good.
See short below.
Everything happens with reason and intent even if we can’t see it.
Ok, well this will be my last Friday not working for many moons to come.
I’m hoping to make the most of it.
Have a great Friday and a wonderful weekend.
Be Blessed.
Love & Light,
Neecie
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