Just Stupid

 

Hello.

I lied. Apparently, I am going to blog today. 

Yesterday...I got some stuff done but I'm on a roll this morning and we are just gonna keep this going. 

I got up at 5 this morning and have already been on a walk, meditated, etc. and am dressed for the day. I'm in sweats but hey, my back still hurts and at least I'm dressed.

Getting dressed is a signal for me. It's a subconscious signal that informs my body that, "Hey, we're in it today, we're gonna do this thing."

I've also been crying all morning but that's OK. I find that crying is much more effective when you sob through action.

Sob while you're walking, sob while you attempt to meditate, sob while you do the dishes, look for jobs, make bathbombs, whatever it takes.

And sob while you're blogging.

Just keep swimming.

I will have much to report tomorrow as far as the whole gettin'er done thing.

I have to stay busy or I'll give in to darker thoughts. Fuck those thoughts, it's all self-pity. The fear and frustration are real but the self-pity is just stupid.

I am moving and that has to count for something. Magic is backed up by action/energy and if I want a miracle, then best to act as if, instead of sitting still and if no miracles come, so be it.

I hope to journal each day about what got me to this place. I just have to be careful not to hate on myself. That's just like the self-pity, it's just stupid.

Alright, well, on with it. I question why I'm even bothering but faith without works is dead and so...fake it til you make it and act as if.

I got the nicest comment on my short from yesterday. I've been getting more comments and I'm grateful that people care. A lot of them are about Jesus but you know...like Dad said all those years ago, it all comes from the same source. So pray for me, that's fine. I'm grateful for it.

I hope you all have a good day.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie