Oh you guys, I would've loved to blog this weekend but Saturday I woke up in "go" mode and got so much done.
I also went out, I went to the Pumpkin Patch with my daughter, her bestie and her bestie's kiddo. Then we all went out to eat.
I was relaxing and the shit hit the fan.
I felt this weird "tug" in my jaw as I ate and then the sensation of something letting go inside of me and I felt my face and the entire left side of my face was swollen.
I mean, I could go into all the "stuff" that came along with it but I facetimed my sister so she could see and we went down the rabbit hole of what this could be. She's good that way. We were on the phone for quite awhile. Her and my bestie are honestly the only two people I can bear to be on the phone with...well my kids too. I just can't deal with being told what to do...I just need to vent and laugh and get loved on and love on others. I don't want advice, it stresses me out and I get this sense of frustration when people don't understand. I know I need to let that go but for now, just venting, just having others hold space for me. My sister's got that down. I mean, she does say I need to quit smoking but it's the way she does it, it's not this big psychological evaluation of me. I'm just really grateful to have her.
After speaking with her, I went to bed and vertigo kicked in. I've had bad, long lasting vertigo before but never anything like this. I would move and then I'd dry heave over and over because of the nauseousness.
Yesterday was better, the fluids have mostly drained from my face but I was exhausted. And not to mention the vertigo came and went.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning and didn't go back to sleep, I just laid there and had some cuddle sessions with Pumps and Grey.
I knew I had finally gotten some decent deep sleep because I felt refreshed.
I'm continuing with the neti pot twice a day because I believe that my doing this is what finally released some of the shit that's been building up in my sinuses.
In spite of everything, I did get a shower in last night and that felt amazing...I don't like being dirty.
So hopefully, we are now on the mend.
I wanted to go on a walk this morning but I'm taking it slow. The main things for me at this point, is to do self-care stuff that will help with whatever I'm going through now.
And to get my food for the day together. I'll deal with tonight when it comes.
And I'll write about it tomorrow.
So I guess I better get going. The next 4 weeks are going to be nuts.
I need to focus on all that needs to get done but also all that I need to do to be OK.
I've been writing out stories everyday about someone in my life who has passed, you know, just honoring one person and their impact on my life at a time.
It's been bittersweet but it's also been amazing to look back and see how blessed I am to have known so very many lovely, talented, caring people.
Blessed is the word for it.
Alright, onwards as they say.
Have a great day loves.
Be Blessed.
Love & Light,
Neecie
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