Such a Task

 

Good Morning,

I meant to blog yesterday, even started one but time got away from me. And soon, I have to shower so I get out the door on time.

Again, I have no clue how I slept. I do think I'm going to put the fitbit on again, but only during the day so that I can monitor my steps. I don't like not knowing.

And sometimes, it does push me to work a little harder.

The only thing about the sleep monitoring that I miss is knowing my resting heart rate, what it sinks down to.

But overall, I think it's good not to use it for sleep monitoring.

And I think if I try to reach my goal for the week, I should have a good understanding of what that looks like, and how hard to push myself without the fitbit.

I just don't want to be reliant on it anymore.

Ugh, doctor's appointment this afternoon. I don't mean ugh that I have to go but I have to shave when I shower and do something with the girl part because it's not pretty.

Not that my doctor cares but I do.

My boss is going out on the crew today to help get the jobs done faster since it's going to be so hot. The guys hydrate and everything but still...and today is supposed to be even more brutal than yesterday and yesterday...was bad.

I used to love winter but last winter was the first one where the cold was hard on me too.

Getting old is so lovely.

At least by the end of this week, I may have some answers as to why I am experiencing some of the pain and discomfort I've been feeling, I'll be on meds and on my way to better health...I hope.

I just don't want to sit here and cry anymore. I am so sick of crying and this eternal sadness.

I hope it's not eternal, I hope it'll be solved with the antidepressants.

The triage people called me yesterday, concerned. I had to fill out paperwork prior to my appointment and they do a depression assessment and apparently, I scored so high, they were worried I was planning to off myself. I told them no, I'm just that sad.

No plans for the end.

Yeah, so at least I get to leave work early today. 

I'm ok with the job now and they are ok with me but I have to say that it's just...it's boring and it's so sedentary. Once it's not so hot outside, I'll go for little walks every hour or so, just like a 2 to 3 minute walk to keep things flowing. I've been having a little bit of a problem with swelling in my lower legs and ankles and feetsies.

Movement is one of the things that can help with that. 

And...drum roll...I drank 8 glasses of water yesterday. I was also up 3 times to pee last night. I'm still peeing it all out for goodness sakes.

Alright, I better go. Time to hit the shower.

Why does everything feel like such a task? 

Yesterday's short:

I hope you all have a great day.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie