The Future Card

 

Hi Everyone,

Big deflating sigh.

But I can't give in to that. I'm just ah, I'm really overwhelmed. I did get some things done yesterday but I am completely unmotivated.

I did a tarot reading this morning and in the present position, the card was reversed and represents self-pity, self-indulgence and depression. 

Yup.

But the future card represents going after your dream, fresh starts, chasing your bliss and new ideas.

Time to jump in I guess.

In many ways, I'm back to where I always end up. I am willing to do the work but I need the stability of a permanent job.

Am I grateful to not be at that job I was last at? Yeah. I'm grateful.

But it just sucks.

Because I didn't choose that situation. That was beyond my control. And here I am saying I'm willing, let's do this...and this happens.

So today, I did start with meditation. I am gonna do the dishes because I'm hoping maintenance will show up and fix my sink today.

I had to make a huge payment on a credit card because I forgot that my electric bill was paid with it and put me over my limit.

Fuck me.

That company still has not signed my time card. I'm going to email the woman who hired me. I don't have the boss's email or I'd email him. I give no fucks. Pay me.

I have to change my attitude.

So I'm going to take care of the basics this morning, just keep going and we'll go from there. Somehow, I have to turn all this around.

So on that note, I'm going to sign off and see what I can do with this day.

Thanks for stopping in, send hugs if you would because I'm feeling a bit fragile.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie