If It Was Just Me

Hello, Hello,

Oh you guys. Why this struggle to do anything? I took a shower.

 

That’s it so far.

I still have a good portion of day in front of me. I’m starving even though this stomach pain continues. I’m gonna make some scrambled eggs with cheese and make myself my protein shake and that’ll be it for food for today because of the pain. 

If I eat too much, I suffer.

But at least I can eat.

I’m very anxious and also sad. My sister’s remaining pup is not doing so well. You look at this dog and you would never know how old she is. She still looks so youthful to me and she is stunningly beautiful. But she is I believe either close to 13 or actually 13 now and that’s old for a greyhound. I think anyone who has ever taken on an animal and loved them questions themselves towards the end, why do I do this, because it is so very hard to lose them.

And let’s face it, not everyone who owns an animal should. But my sister is not one of those people. Her dogs are treated in a way that all animals should be treated, and they are the most loving creatures as a result.

Just perfect little souls.

How can such tiny beings bring such an incredibly big amount of love into our hearts? They just do.

So I am sad.

Sad for my sister, too, this kind of lossis horrific.

I’m getting through this time and we are quickly approaching the danger zone. I even considered just saying fuck it and paying all my bills and ignoring the rent and letting that go, but I can’t do that to my daughter. If it was just me, I would. But it is not just me.

And so here we are and here I am, and you can only move through it. Aligning with the flow, right?

Yup.

So here I go, going to align myself now. And we shall see what the day brings. Or, you know, what the rest of the day brings.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie