Plans

Well Hello There,

So happy. I got my bathbombs wrapped. I only have 20 of them, but, the money would allow us to get some groceries and put something towards rent. The cynical, self pitting the side of me wants to say why even fucking bother?

But the other side says, no no, let’s keep going, let’s keep trying. The most ridiculous part of this, and please understand when I say this, I am not saying that anyone should help us, the most ridiculous part of this is that all I need is $3600. That’s my portion of the rent for January, February and March.

I had someone reach out to me about a part-time job, but it would be less than I get from unemployment and so I thought no, not yet. But if we somehow make it until March 1, as soon as I go back to that regular job if I don’t find another one, I’m going to get a part-time job. And that part-time job, I’m going to have to stick with it, I have a goal of 18 months to pay off my debt and so for 18 months, I will need to work a second job.

It will be worth it to have the debt paid off. I looked at what I’m paying an interest each month and it just took my breath away. But I still am determined to do this. I was with a friend last night and she said I’m just asking, I’m just wondering, why won’t you file bankruptcy? You see, I’ve been there done that, many times in my life, and my life has been about taking the easy way out. When things get hard, I do everything or at least in the past, I have done everything to fuck them up even more. I am never going to learn the lesson of how to spend money responsibly, and to have a healthy relationship for lack of a better term, with money, unless I do this. Bankruptcy is part of the problem with our economy, it is not a solution.

Another friend asked me if I’m going to get rid of my credit cards as I pay them off. The answer to that is no. Not all of them anyways. I am going to hang onto every single one of them until they are paid off. Once they are paid off, I will be making phone calls because I’m so irresponsible. I don’t even know what my interest rate is on my cards and I don’t even know which cards I have Annual fees for. Any card with an annual fee, I will be getting rid of. Of the remaining cards, I will be making phone calls to find out if they will decrease my interest rate.

You have to play the game.

Anyways, I did post a video of the few bath bombs I was able to make. Here is that video.

It’s a very small thing, these bath bombs, but I will tell you this; as far as my vision list for October 2025 to October 2026, it doesn’t matter what I put out there as a product for people to purchase, it just matters that I do it. Something, anything. I just do it. 

I am very lucky to have supplies right now for certain things. I am not even going to worry about how this is all going to unfold. For once in my life, I have no big plan. My plans don’t work because I’m A-to-Z without B through Y.

Fuck all that.

You know I’m sitting here and I just realize how can I trust the universe when I don’t even trust myself? What I’m talking about is not that I will continue to screw up money and blah blah blah, what I’m talking about is that I just don’t follow through on things.

But you know what, I did get some good things done yesterday. I had to cancel my debit card as there was fraudulent activity, but nothing that the bank didn’t cover so that’s good.

I didn’t even freak out about that. I just called the bank and they put me with security and they were actually going to call me as they had just flagged the charge.

But now I have no access to my damn funds unless I want to get my lazy ass up and go to the bank. I don’t.

The weather is supposed to get bad today. I have a little bit of $ left on one of my cards and it's either use the card or starve, so I'm headed out to get a few groceries.

Stay safe, the weather is being wicked everywhere you turn, look, read about...just stay safe.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie