Ah yes. Afternoon. I did not go into work today. But it was out of my hands and my boss actually texted me back this morning after I told her I was trying to get there and told me that I am all caught up, that all is well and that she had to leave early today and her mom wasn't coming in.
I haven't been given keys so I would've had to leave early anyways and I had no way of getting home.
My car went out on me yesterday. Luckily, it happened at work so I wasn't stranded on the side of the road.
While all this was playing out, someone from work had a medical crisis and there were some tears, not on my part, but I could relate to those tears because of my mom and it triggered me but only for seconds.
At that point, I had decided a meltdown was in order but only the tiniest of meltdowns, a moment or two of self-pity sounded good to me but my chest tightened up on me, no pain and I realized that anxiety and panic would not serve me.
I started breathing in deep and I told myself the following: The Universe is not out to get me, the Universe loves me. This is not bad karma. This my friends, is life on life's terms and we want to label it but it really is just that; life on life's terms.
Life's terms are all the things. Yes, this throws me right back into financial crisis as my footing there was precarious at best and while I seemed to be winning, I was nowhere near that yet.
But life's terms are rather amazing at times too because out of all of this came a ride home with my son and that...made all of this...so worth it.
We had a very good talk and I listened and I took in who my son is now.
I am so proud.
His journey is one worth taking note of.
These are the journey's I respect so much. These are the journey's that inspire me and give me the courage to forge ahead and onwards.
And what of the financial consequences of this life on life's terms experience? Well, I don't fully know at this point but what I do know is that...we, I and thus we, will be OK. We have been all along and who am I to say that that will stop? I don't think it will, I think we'll be OK.
I just don't know how yet, but I see it and I know it and that's what matters. Stay open dear girl. Believe.
Hopefully, the car will be done today so I can go in tomorrow. I think I have enough between checking and my credit card to pay this. I'll just need a ride to pick my car up. We shall deal with the rent piece when it comes.
All is well and all manner of things is well.
Honestly, it really is that simple.
I'm relaxing today, it's raining but it's a gentle rain and I am going to take a bath in the dark with candles and listen to music that feeds my soul and if that's all I do today, that's all good.
My daily short, both yesterday's and today's:
Be Blessed Loves.
Love & Light,
Neecie
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