Good Within the Not Good

 

Hello,

How is everyone today? It's gloom and doom cloudy here, a bit of a chill in the air, not Spring like at all. Meh.

Yes, meh.

Let's talk about meh.

I've been trying to break out of this frozen thing since mom passed. I don't think it's because mom passed at this point, I just think that's where it kicked into high gear.

I definitely have had this problem most of my adult life.

And it has affected the quality of my life. 

And I've tried so many things but not consistently.

So what would things look like in one month if I stuck to healthy eating, healthy sleep patterns, an exercise plan, took my vitamins/supplements, meditated everyday (this I actually usually do), used my happy light, etc.

There are so many things I get excited to try and I just dump them, let them fall by the wayside. I do believe that the whole thing also requires a bit of mental health toughness with myself. Self-talk can go a long way. Affirmations are a part of that.

One month...like...can I do it? One month. That's all.

You know, there are a lot of "new" fads out there; collagen, mushrooms, various detoxes, etc. Seriously, if you tried to take all of these, you'd spend your entire grocery budget on this shit. 

So for now, I'm limiting myself to my daily vitamins, a calcium supplement, my KaChava, which I drink on workout days because of the big protein payoff it contains and the fact that it contains some of almost every nutrient you need each day. I also am drinking "mushroom" coffee.

I have watched so many videos on mushrooms and their value and also read a lot about them. I include all mushrooms in this and even "magic" mushrooms. They changed my life, my perspective, my perception, my way of viewing the world. To be completely out of "yourself" and to experience the world in a totally sensory way, but not attaching your own thoughts to it...the wonder I experienced, the tears I shed, there was this purging that for me, it just lightened "me" up. So my goal with those is to trip twice a year, once on Beltane and once on Samhain.

I would never recommend this for anyone. It has to be a choice. If you are considering it, read, read, read. I only do them in a ritual setting, for me it's not about the laughter or the frivolity of it. And those things are not guaranteed. You can have a bad trip on shrooms too. I never have but I do cry on them, I shed enough tears that I believe these tears come from past lives too. I just do. That's me. You can call me hokey.

This is one of the reasons I don't identify myself as being in "recovery" although I do count the trips as part of my own personal "recovery". I hate that word.

Journey. Part of my journey.

They are still illegal so you gotta have a plug. I won't provide that for anyone, but if you put it out to the Universe, if it's meant to be, it will come to you.

But seriously, read about mushrooms, all kinds of them, not just the magic ones, watch documentaries, it's amazing and there is lots of research to back this all up.

So I digress; this frozen thing.

One month.

One month of hitting it hard. 

I really want to try and eat in a way that promotes all the good things too; a healthy weight, no tummy issues, no bloating or swelling anywhere, a clear mind, the ability to focus better, energy, a better night's rest.

So in this month, just this one month, I wouldn't eat out and I wouldn't get any fast food.

It's my plan, because of cost, to cut way back on that anyway. I'm thinking one sit down a month and one fast food if I absolutely have to have it but for this first month, could I just go without it.

A month doesn't seem that long but to me, it can seem endless. And with this mockery of a presidency going on...the stress, the outright hate, the vitriol, it's nasty and it's hard, it's hard not to retreat into depression and protection mode. And I'm not without fault here. When I say hatred, stress, vitriol, I'm on both sides of it myself. I am a hater and I do, in the deepest recesses of my mind, wish for certain outcomes. Hating, I would argue is even more damaging than being hated. My anxiety has been through the roof from the constant barrage of information, which it's up to me to research and go through, to come to conclusions on whether it's accurate or not and then fear based on the things people predict will come to pass.

I think a lot of people who suffer from the "frozen in place" thing, are experiencing it at a higher level than even they know how to cope with and I think that people who never had this problem, are having it and have no idea what to do about it.

These times man...not good.

But you can create bubbles of good within the not good. One bubble is my health; mental and physical. Another is friends and family and time spent with them. Another is rituals, which I have completely, 100% moved away from. How about I just start at Beltane? Like, let's do this. Because I believe that practicing that which brings you closer to the spiritual realm helps too.

I don't care what you worship or who you worship, as long as it causes no harm to others. As long as it's love directed.

So for one month, can I make something happen? Can I do an honest assessment of myself after 30 days and see where things are at, how I feel, my stress level...am I feeling better in general physically and mentally? 

Why not?

Why not?

So that's what I've got today. I may have more tomorrow. You just never know.

And so, on that note, I bid you good day.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie