What Ev's

 

Hi Everyone,

Geez, I didn't blog yesterday so I am already falling short. But yesterday got away with me due to my own laziness and seemingly inability to fucking prioritize. 

It's OK though. Today is all the fuck over the place. I passed the background check but I am having lots of issues with the onboarding process. I was supposed to start today. 

But the new offer letter came in and it was dated for Monday. I got links for training but I'm not going to train and not get paid. I want to clean, make a lotion and help my son with something. And i was a dumbshit and had a massive coffee st night so i went to bed at like 1:38AM.

Stupid.

But what-ev's, what's done is done so I need to just make the most of it and go on already. I ended up not doing to much. My big accomplishment was that I took a nap.

So now I'm blogging and I'm just going to keep going til bed time. It was hot out today and it really sucked.

But, that also is what it is. I'm ready for fall though I know not many others are.

This blog is rambling. I'm gonna go and I'll report to you on how things go tomorrow.

Be Blessed all.

Love & Light,

Neecie

The Witch Tree

 

Hi Everyone,

I have wanted to blog, I really have but doing anything, per the norm of late, is like trudging through a mountain of sticky, thick shit.

But today, there has been progress. Also per the norm, I have not finished my list and I won't but I made hella progress.

Got my exercise in, almost at my step count. I'm going to do all my computer shit until around 6:30 or so but then...chill time. 

I don't think I'll be working yet tomorrow as I still haven't heard anything on my background check so tomorrow, I will hit the things I didn't do today. Nothing more. No new things on the list.

And I'll worry about Wednesday tomorrow night. 

Each day sortof depends on whether I hear back on my background check.

This past Saturday, I met two friends for breakfast. One of them lives in Georgia and so I very rarely see her. She is the lifelong best friend of the other friend of mine who was there. You know, we were just sitting there catching up and I wasn't saying to much, just enjoying the conversation and they asked how I was doing and I opened my mouth to say that I'm fine and...I started sobbing. They walked me through it. 

Sheesh.

I've been walking around thinking I'm fine. What does that say for me about wellness, about my being on top of my mental health shit?

This is all a journey, it's all progress and not perfection. 

I didn't, I wasn't able, to get any of the things I had planned to do this weekend because I was needed  by one person or another and I am not complaining, they needed me for an important reason.

I really, really, really am going to go away for a weekend in September, after my Willow's Whimsy opening event. And like I've said before, I'm turning my phone off, everyone will know where I'm at, so if there were to be an emergency, I could be reached at the hotel.

It would be beautiful to be up there in the fall...in Duluth or outside of it. I don't want to go all the way up to Grand Marais but at the same time, I'd like to go visit the "witch" tree. See this link: Witch Tree.

Maybe I could drive up Friday after work, get up early Saturday and make the drive north, stopping along the way and seeing everything I love to see and end up at the Witch Tree, and then head back. I could be back in Duluth by early evening and watch the sun go down from the beach, light a bunch of candles and take a jacuzzi bath by candlelight. Then I could journal, maybe do a little ritual on the beach...just peaceful, quiet, healing alone time.

Doesn't that sound amazing?

I think so too.

I got some really good smoking cessation advice. One of my friends from the breakfast mentioned above, told me she had a friend who looked at her smoking habit as not one habit but lots of little habits. And she got rid of them one by one. But there is already a problem so I am going to change two habits at once; the first habit I wanted to change was that I am no longer going to smoke first thing in the morning, not until my morning routine is complete. Well, I did that but then I power smoked the rest of the day. Like, it's 5:50pm and I only have 2 smokes left. So that's clearly not good. So from now on, no chain smoking. One cig and then I have to stay busy for awhile before having another. The whole point is smoking less and less.

Well there you have it. I am really going to try hard to blog everyday this month. 

I hope you all had a good Monday. Be Blessed.

Love & Light,

Neecie